Tuesday, May 8, 2018

Your Official Guide to the Battle of the Chris Ps


There are certain questions that divide the nation. NSYNC or Backstreet Boys? Britney or Christina? Ham or turkey? Dogs or cats? Beach or mountains? Chris P or Chris P?

I'm referring to Chris Pratt versus Chris Pine.

Now, Chris Pine is my one true love, the man who has captured my heart and made me a Star Trek fan, but Chris Pratt has also stolen my heart and made me believe in dinosaurs.

They are both beautiful in their own ways, but there can only be one winner. I'm here to crown him.

Just PMSing's Official Math of the Chris Ps
Chris Pine is attractive. +10

Chris Pratt is attractive. +10

Chris Pine has never been in a movie worth a damn. -5

Chris Pine isn't as famous. -3

Chris Pine isn't as famous. +3

Chris Pratt has been married. -4

Chris Pratt knows what it takes to be in a serious relationship. +5

Chris Pine literally dates a new chick every three weeks. -4

Chris Pine's new chick could be you. +5

Chris Pratt is funny. +10

Chris Pine is charming as hell. +10

Chris Pratt has an ex-wife with a podcast. -10

Chris Pine once kind of dated LiLo. -8

Chris Pratt knows Amy Poehler. +9

Chris Pine knows the English pop/rock band McFly. +8

Chris Pratt probably carries a pocket knife. +6

Chris Pine crosses his legs. +7

Chris Pratt is in a movie where he hits on Zoe Saldana's character. +1

Chris Pine is in a movie where he hits on Zoe Saldana's character. +1

Chris Pratt has a Twitter. +5

Chris Pratt's Instagram is bad. -7

Chris Pine has a flip phone. -10

Chris Pine cried at the Oscars. +8

Chris Pratt knows Jennifer Lawrence. +6

Chris Pratt has had a sex scene with Jennifer Lawrence. -10

Chris Pine = 22

Chris Pratt = 21

V CLOSE RACE, MEN, BUT CHRIS PINE IS THE WINNER, ALL OTHER CHRISES GO HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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